Writing is fun ...

... it's the everything else that's really tedious.  Just finishing up the third proofing of my novella with a pair of pruning sheers (it seems), and that is such a chore.

I'm thinking of all of the excuses I've made for not even attempting to publish before.  True, the New York machine was the most intimidating fear, but there were really good reasons why I never sent a query letter ... I wasn't good enough yet.  Whether I am now or not is certainly subjective from my point of view, but the joy of writing - the thing that had me writing at an early age was never the prospect of publishing for others, but the creation of the story itself.  This was what I loved - creating that imaginary universe, and having characters I also created move about and live within the confines of that world.

My stories have mostly always been to amuse myself - whether it be the week-long erotic daydream sagas I would invent to put myself to sleep at night, or the steamy short stories I would write to flesh out a particular fantasy I was having at that given point of my life.  Publishing eventually became a second goal, but after three or four stories turned into full novel-sized manuscripts, the energy to process those pieces dissipated after the second draft ... it was creating those worlds and characters that made it wondrous for me, not the work to make those stories better and marketable.

With the changing markets, I am encouraged to put my stories to the market test once again.  I know I no longer have to appeal to a few discerning eyes in Manhattan - for me, success will be selling enough to recoup the expenses it takes to put out at least one story.  To have that many people read anything I write will be a joy in and of itself, and if it's more than that - it will simply be all the more delightful.

But, that isn't why I write.  First, I write for myself - for that pure pleasure of creating a life story of someone completely imagined, but real and palpable enough to imprint itself onto the canvas of very real hearts and minds.  These characters already do that for me ... and so much more.  To the extent others may have the same reaction ... it will just be icing on the already delicious cake!

Now ... back to work!